Spirit Day

Across the country today people are celebrating “Spirit Day.”  A creation by teenager Brittany McMillan to honor the teenagers who have taken their own lives in recent weeks, but also to show hundreds of thousands of LGBTQIA youth who face similar pressures and bullying that there is a vast community of people who support them.  Purple was chosen as it represents “spirit” on the rainbow flag, a symbol for LGBT Pride that was created by Gilbert Baker in 1978 (from GLAAD website).

So this morning I was stuck with a dilemma.   For those of you that know me well, you won’t be surprised that there isn’t an ounce of purple in my wardrobe.  Over the years I have intentionally steered clear of that powercat color just in case I would be tainted.  But I woke up this morning wishing that maybe I hadn’t gotten rid of that shirt that I had been given years ago – just for today.

I’ve been concerned that the media has twisted much of the Rutgers tragedy and others to be focused on the social media aspects of what happened.  Yes, social media played a role in this, but the reality is that students are outed by others every day – with potentially tragic effects.  While we’ll never know if Tyler Clementi would have committed suicide if his roommate had just “told” others that Tyler was gay—the social media piece isn’t the cause of the problem.

Campuses now have been focused on conversations about policies and computer usage, and even what state laws are in place to combat the use of cyberspace for bullies.  While I absolutely applaud those efforts and believe that it is something that we must do, I can’t help but feel like it is short-sided.

I’ve had the privilege to work on campuses that are “known” to be LGBTQIA friendly.  They have been honored by the Advocate and that information has been shared in admissions information.  But even in those locations our LGBTQIA students, faculty and staff still face scrutiny and risk by being who they are and living true to themselves.  The bullying of our faculty and staff may occur more quietly than that of our students, but it’s still there.  Whether it is lack of partner benefits, or simply sideways glances or uncomfortable shifting when “partners” are being discussed, it creates and environment that doesn’t allow everyone to achieve their full potential.

I don’t have great or novel ideas on this – I wish I did.  I only ask all of you to think about the environment that you create – through your words, your thoughts, your actions, and your inactions.  Let’s not make Mr. Clementi’s death about social media – let’s put the blame squarely where it belongs -- on homophobia and heterosexism.  This has simply got to stop.

So while I own no purple. Please know that I am fully in the “spirit” today.