Walk A Mile in Her Shoes

Last night the Women’s Center at UMKC sponsored their fourth Walk A Mile in Her Shoes®: the International Men’s March to Stop Rape, Sexual Assault and Gender Violence event to benefit prevention efforts related to domestic violence and sexual assault.  The program is a light-hearted way to bring attention to the role of men in stopping sexual assault and domestic violence.   While a large group of men walking around campus in high heels made people stop, stare, whoop and holler, I was struck by the conversations amongst the men as we were walking.  Many laughed and joked, but others found solace in the walk by talking about a friend/sister/mother that have been victims of this type of violence.   Those groups walked slower and were more focused on the reason we were there. 

Each fall our campuses seemed to be rocked with stories of sexual assault.   And while we know many aren’t reported, the damage caused by these actions reverberate through our campus communities with force.  If you haven’t received a call from a parent after a reported campus assault wanting to know what you personally are doing to ensure their child’s saftey – count yourself lucky. 

Additionally, we know that most men do not believe that they, or their friends could ever do something like this to another person.  It’s always someone else.  That’s where I believe we can make a difference with bystander intervention training.  One of the neatest resources I’ve seen is available here.

As you might guess, this has been an area of passion for me.  After sitting and listening to friends whose lives were changed by an assault, working with students whose were blaming themselves for what had happened, and working through the judicial process with alleged perpetrators, it’s clear there is no “good” in these situations, and teachable moments with this much pain aren’t worth it.  These experiences led me to study training programs in the residence halls, acceptance of rape myths amongst college students and student perceptions of victims and perpetrators as my dissertation study.  As a result of these experiences, and more that colleagues can share, I staunchly believe that is an issue we can impact.

I hope you will “walk with me” on this issue -- It’s important that we stand up for each other.

For media coverage of our Walk see: NBC  Coverage

A special thanks to Brenda Bethman, Arzie Umali, Michelle Kroner and Kerra McCorkle for letting me be a part of this event.